Shame on you, Simon G.

"Blended Family" (Mr. Yuk face here!)

Mr. Yuk means NO! Stay Away!
OK, fan base (of maybe one)... The term "blended families" IS BULLSH*T. Probably embraced by:

• Everyone who loves the ADD label
• And voted for Obama
• And has jumped on the "green" bandwagon because it's trendy, not because said persons are TRULY willing to change their lifestyle choices in the interest of preserving Mother Earth

IMHO, "Blended Family" = QUITTING the person you were supposed to love, honor, and cherish (ok, maybe not obey!) for the rest of your life + marrying someone NEW, and dragging your kids into the whole MESS.

Marriage doesn't have DO-OVERS. Maybe you should have planned better in the first place? And to try to put a positive spin on your "do-over" is even more pathetic. I feel sick... Ipecac syrup*, anyone?

(*Used to cause vomiting in emergency situations, such as poisoning or overdose.)

More, from the Becoming a Stepmom blog:
"Another problem with the word blended is that it creates an assumption that two families will easily and smoothly merge into one new family. But as members of stepfamilies know, it’s not as easy as pressing a button and everyone has found their place in this new family of strangers... It’s more like curdling in the beginning than blending.”

No sh*t.

Spoilt Brat?

OK, now HERE is some really cool sh*t that is strange yet beautiful.

From the lovely Sheelah Goh comes "THE HEIRESS, Spoilt Brat Decadent Goddess Wrist-Cum-Ankle Cuff with Victorian Taffeta Trim, Bollywood Brocade, Amethyst, and Hessonite Garnet."

I am seriously considering this as a crazy/exotic wedding accessory for myself and my maid of honor that I know for a fact people won't be able to stop talking about... But is that a good thing?

God Bless Bacon I

What other better title for my first post in this blog that no one is going to read anyway?

My friends and I have nothing to hide... we are ALL card-carrying members of the Church of Bacon. We worship it.

So what better treat to find in the June 22, 2009 issue of People than a gift guide suggestion of BACONNAISE?

Lo and behold--in my usual surf-y fashion--I stumbled upon other J&D's bacon gems worth buying (or at least coveting) that I have decided you should know about:

• Bacon salt (num num num)
• Bacon-flavored lip balm (GET OUT!)
• Ultimate bacon lover's gift pack (hint hint)

None of this stuff is currently available on Amazon, and I don't think it is available in my most-favorite place on the planet, Minneapolis (second only to the Quad Cities, which is tied with Dubuque, Iowa and East Dubuque, Illinois...oh, and lest we forget the terribly scenic and sophisticated Colona--and Green River!--Illinois. Oy vey! OK... maybe Minneapolis doesn't suck so much. And at least there is work here for me. And a fiance. But the winters are CRAP!).

But you can "bet your bippy" (exactly what IS a bippy, anyway?!?!) I signed up for Amazon's "Alert Me" service. They are gonna e-mail me when (if?) these items are ever again available to order.